For some strange reason, we think that we need to have our lives together. And by this I mean have a clear career path, a loving partner, a healthy mind and body, and a social life etc.
We want everyone to think that we are successful in many aspects of our lives and have our shiz together to make everyone proud and possibly have people to look up to you.
But the truth for many is that we rarely ever have all of this.
With social media these days, we see this perfect image of the life that we can only dream about when in truth it is all a lie.
No one has the perfect life, just the ability to make it look like they do.
I recently attended a party where I hadn’t seen these people in years, and talked about how great my life is. There may have been a few white lies but it was all about what I decided to tell them to give the illusion that my life was perfect. They didn’t know how very single I was or that my main source of income was nothing that I actually want to do with myself as a career yet caused me crippling stress and anxiety. Nope, according to them I was living my best life, exactly where I wanted to be – happily single, career driven, happy and healthy.
It is another case of don’t believe what you see. That is why you should just focus on yourself. No one else’s opinion should decide what makes you happy and where you need to be in life. We try to live up to these crazy expectations that we put on ourselves and cause us so much disappointment.
A few months ago I decided to join a gym to work on at least one of the ideals that I was after. I thought that if people saw me looking slimmer, I was then happy, even if the rest of my life was an absolute mess.
We always make ourselves goals like having a stable job and lose 10 kgs by the following year, and then the new year comes around and we are disappointed that we haven’t met our super unrealistic goals.
Is it because of lack of trying? Fear of failure so didn’t even try? The pressure from those closest to you?
It is like when you write a to do list that seems impossible to finish so you spend the entire day avoiding it instead of tackling it head first.
What are your priorities?
Do you want the career of your dreams? A fulfilling family and social life? The perfectly sculpted body and glowing skin?
What is your choice?
So instead of beating yourself up, think about the things that you really want, that are achievable. Don’t believe that happiness is associated with something that you want but don’t have yet. It’s just a set up for failure. Happiness is when you realise how grateful you are for being where you are today, for having a support network around you and for having the opportunities that have been presented to you.
Instead of making goals, gain experiences, and make mistakes. Be proud of who you are and be happy with who you are. Remember you are exactly where you are meant to be.
Life is not meant to be sad. It is meant to be lived.