Ep 7 – The Intruders… hang on who are they?

Ok team Ep 7 dropped and IT WAS PROMISED by channel 10 that it would be epic drama-ness. It kind of was but not really as much as promised. I feel cheated Channel 10 – I thought it was a cray intruder losing her mind and running off into a bush. But it was an original as we find out later in the ep… it feels like an anti climax. Dammit.

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But back to the main game team. Group date time – announced by “I’m a political advisor’ Aleisha. WHERE IS OSHER. I know the budget cuts are hurting but get him back in the game pls. Date cards must not just appear?

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Group dates are like group assignments at uni. Sound good in theory… in reality ALWAYS shit where some kid you don’t know and didn’t want to be with either bosses you around OR fails to respond to the group text and you end up doing their work for them…ok rant over.

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Back to the date – SHOCK HORROR – there are intruders. Like there are every season. Much angst. All are brunette – Cass breathes a sigh of relief – no competition for the blonde extensions in the bathroom. Apparently according to mean girl Cat they are zero competition and ‘a bit average’. Which is interesting because you have seen them for approximately 5 seconds.

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They play some cheap ball game – no helicopters here – and generally follow the ‘make a fool of yourself for love’ game hard. Brooke being actually good at sport accidentally injures intruder Jamie-Lee. I could say something about hyphenated names here. I won’t……….

Bachie carries her off to get medical attention – so everyone immediately begins to think of ways to ‘slip over’ at the next cocktail party. Good strategy Jamie-Lee, killed it.

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Single date time and it is an intruder who gets it – oops nope apparently Tenille has always been here? I swear to god I have never seen her. Any hoo… they have a date… it seems nice. Kiss at the end… seems quite keen generally. She seems pretty excited. Fair call Tenille.

Now for the cocktail party… now we KNOW that there is a fight. And we thought it would be the intruders but no its Romy essentially calling Tenille a hypocrite for kissing their collective boyfriend when she apparently once said she doesn’t kiss on the first date. Please WHO CARES. You are on a dating show – I am guessing you are all behaving differently than normal life – or perhaps Romy is ok with the guy she dating a thousand other women… each to their own.

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Romy keeps being a crazy bitch and harassing Tenille. Who eventually loses the plot. Then we cut to Blair Witch Project style hand held cameras as we chase her and a producer through the bush… its all just a bit weird. Especially as she ends up back at the rose ceremony with the rest of the team. I’m not convinced I am down with the producers being so present in this season… it ruins the constructed magic of romance. It just isn’t romantic chasing a girl through the bush.

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Rethink this strategy pls Channel 10

Rose ceremony – Mean girls get a rose. Intruders get roses cue much drama. DUDE he is here to find love – he obviously has already written some of you off but hasn’t had a chance to meet these newbies. They were always staying.

Till tomorrow bitches.

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